Oh the Germans, can’t they ever lose?
Well, they’ve got all the money and none of the blues.
Well, they’ve got fancy cars and they drive real fast
Because there’s no speed limit on the autobahns.

Well, Is you in or is you ain’t
A true blue citizen lying in wait
For the United States of Europe?

Go to France but prepare to hike
Because the roads are closed with another strike.
Well, they laugh at Charlie and our royal heirs
Yeah, but they’re only jealous ‘cause they killed all theirs.

Well, Is you in or is you ain’t
A doomsday prophet or a patron saint
Of the United States of Europe?

Those Italians think they’re so damn cool
Because they don’t wear helmets and they drive like fools
With their slicked back hair and their Gucci shades,
With a brand new government every day.

Well, Is you is or is you ain’t,
Or are you just resigned to your fate
In the United States of Europe?