Neil: It's a silly song, but we like it.
I find the twist works very well, okay...
Are you ready ? [...] style !

Take the National Express
When your life’s in a mess
It’ll make you smile.
All human life is here
From the feeble old dear
To the screaming child,
From the student who knows
That to have one of those
Would be suicide
To the family man
Manhandling the pram
With paternal pride.

And everybody sings bababababababada
Yeah! bababababababada
Ah ha! bababababababada
Alright! bababababababada
We’re go- bababababababada
Ing where bababababababada
The air bababababababada
Is free. bababababababada
Yeah.

On the National Express
There’s a jolly hostess
Selling crisps and tea.
Yum yum !
She’ll provide you with drinks
And theatrical winks
For a sky-high fee.
Mini-skirts were in style
When she danced down the aisle
Back in ‘63,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But it’s hard to get by
When your arse is the size
Of a small country.

And everybody sings bababababababada
Yeah! bababababababada
Ah ha! bababababababada
Alright! bababababababada
We’re go- bababababababada
Ing where bababababababada
The air bababababababada
Is free. bababababababada

Tomorrow
Tomorrow belongs to me!
It belongs to me.

When you’re sad and feeling blue
With nothing better to do
Don’t just sit there feeling stressed,
Take a trip on
The National Express.
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
On the National Express.
Yeah, oh yeah
Let’s play [...] guitar solo!

Neil: Thank you
Okay, everybody sing after me, this is very simple.
Two:

National Express,
National Express,
National Express,
National Express,
Neil: Whoa!
Audience: National Express,
Neil: Very good
Audience: National Express,
Neil: Keep singing
Audience: National Express,
Neil: I gotta do my...
Audience: National Express,
Neil: ...my better talking while you sing it, okay
Audience: National Express,
Neil: Fresh
Audience: National Express,
Neil: Thank you, we've had a great time...
Audience: National Express,
Neil: ...here today. I'd like to thank
Audience: National Express,
Neil: again the Chelmsford constabulary
Audience: National Express,
Neil: for getting me here
Audience: National Express,
Neil: I'd like to thank my band. Keep singing !
Audience: National Express,
Neil: OK, we gotta go
Audience: National Express,
Neil: One big one
Audience: National Express,
Neil: Coming up
Audience: National Express,
Neil: One, two, three, four
Audience: National Express !
Neil: Goodbye !

Neil: Thanks a lot ! Cheerioh ! Cheers, have a good day.